The First Time I Realized I Am A Mom
By: Eva Voorhees
I knew the invitation was coming.
Cody and Jillian had been engaged for more than two years, and their wedding date was set for August. So, I knew an envelope was coming.
When I finally received the invitation, what I didn’t expect was being overcome with joy and emotion as I read it. I clearly was not prepared for it. And, I was pretty taken aback.
Sure, I experienced moments of pride for my son, Cody, before. Watching him graduate from high school. Seeing him earn a full ride scholarship and then graduating from college. And seeing him land his first job.
But I was not prepared for the feelings this little invitation brought out in me. And that is when it really hit me, when it really sunk in. It was the first time I realized I really am a mom.
Cody is my stepson. I met him when he was just eight years old. As a stepmom, I did ALL the mom things that his mom and any other mom does – and I mean all of them. I drove him all around, I took him shopping for clothes and school supplies, I attended parent-teacher conferences, I cheered at sporting events, I clapped at choir concerts.
I was there for the wins, the losses and everything in between. I even remember putting on my “mom clothes” and going to the bars around ASU to drag him out, because he was having a pretty rough period.
But through all of that, I always let Cody know that I would never replace his birth mom, and I never will, and that I was “just a stepmom.” He had both of us, his mom and me. And he still does.
But when that simple invitation arrived, I realized from the emotion that swept over me, that I am not just a stepmom. I am a mom.
And I am so grateful for every little joy, stress, love, and uncertainty that mom-hood has brought me. I feel like my job is just about done and I am so happy for the future of this young couple.
To be honest, I simply can’t wait for my next first time – holding a grandbaby, that I can call mine. Is it too soon to let my daughter-in-law know my chosen grandma name?